Santa’s Slay (2005) Review

“He’s making a list… pray you’re not on it.”

Synopsis: Santa Claus is actually a demon who lost a bet with an angel, so he becomes the giver of toys and happiness. But when the bet is off, he returns to his evil ways.

Santa's Slay (2005) Review Poster
Watch now on Amazon
Calamity Brains:

Santa’s Slay is a gleefully stupid and utterly cheesy B-horror movie starring wrestling champ Bill Goldberg as a buff and badass Santa. (If that sentence isn’t enough to convince you to watch this movie, it’s probably not for you.) This pairing of bizarre backstory/holiday horror has enough one-liners, snarky jokes, and deliberately bad effects to make it an instant classic… if you’re into that sort of thing.*

Santa, as it turns out, has not been jolly by choice all these years; he’s the spawn of Satan and lost a bet with an angel, forcing him to distribute cheer for one thousand years. But now that his thousand years are up, he’s going on a murderous rampage unless someone can stop him. Enter Nicholas (Douglas Smith), his girlfriend Mac (Emilie de Ravin), and his crazy grandpa (Robert Culp) with a secret past. The great part here, though, is despite the whole “destiny” angle, Nicholas and his grandpa spend most of the movie running and hiding from Santa rather than facing him, giving Santa plenty of time to wreak havoc and kill just about everyone in creative ways.

The deliberate ridiculousness of Santa’s Slay is a lot of fun. Aside from the holiday-related one-liners, the movie is chock full of curling and honoring Hanukkah, and includes brief cameos by Fran Drescher, Rebecca Gayheart, and Chris Kattan. If you enjoy our “so-bad-it’s-good” category, definitely give Santa’s Slay a try this Christmas.

*We obviously are.

Calamity Brains’ Rating: B+
Watch now on Amazon

Did You Know 1: Santa's Slay (2005)Did You Know 2: Santa's Slay (2005)Did You Know 3: Santa's Slay (2005)

Calamity Brains

The Codex Mortis Horror Hosts (Ludwig von Stroodle and Calamity Brains) are married and live in West Virginia. Pretty much everyone who sees their cabin agrees that it would be an ideal setting for a horror movie. Their pets include a black widow spider, a smart dog, and a stupid dog. When they aren’t watching horror movies, they can be found at whiskey festivals, Renaissance fairs, and board game nights.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *